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Dec 14, 2016

A Super Funny Joke - The Boy And The Priest

A housewife takes a lover during the day, while her husband is at work.

Unknown to her, her 9 year old son was hiding in the closet. Her husband came home unexpectedly, so she hid her lover in the closet. The boy now has company.

Boy: Dark in here..

Man: Yes it is.

Boy: I have a baseball.

Man: That’s nice.

Boy: Want to buy it?

Man: No, thanks.

Boy: My dad’s outside.

Man: OK, how much?

Boy: $250.

In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the mom’s lover are in the closet together.

Boy: Dark in here.

Man: Yes, it is.

Boy: I have a baseball glove.

Man: How much?

Boy: $750.

Man: Fine.

A few days later, the father says to the boy, “Grab your glove. Let’s go outside and toss the baseball.”

The boy say's, “I can’t. I sold them.”

The father asks, “How much did you sell them for?”

The son says, “$1,000.”

The father says, “That’s terrible to overcharge your friends like that, that is way more than those two things cost. I’m going to take you to church and make you confess.”

They go to church and the father alerts the priest, and makes the little boy sit in the confession booth and closes the door.

The boy says, “Dark in here.”

The priest says, “Don’t start that shit again.”

Jun 18, 2016

Little Johnny And The Priest Joke

A priest was talking to a group of kids about "being good" and going to heaven. At the end of his talk, he asked, "Where do you want to go?"

"Heaven! Heaven!" Yelled Little Lisa..

"And what do you have to be to get there?" asked the priest.

"Dead!" Yelled Little Johnny.

Jun 9, 2016

Bon Appetit - Funny Joke

Santa was spending some of his hard-earned cash on a luxury cruise and was given a table with a Frenchman.

At their first meal together, the Frenchman said, "Bon appetit!"
"Santa Ji," said Santa.

Before the next meal commenced the performance was repeated.

"Bon appetit," said the Frenchman.
"Santa Ji," replied Santa.

After this continued for three days, Santa got fed up, and told a fellow traveller about it.

"He tells me his name is Bon Appetit and I tell him my name is Santa, and then at the next meal, we start all over again."

The fellow traveller laughed and explained to Santa that the Frenchman was not introducing himself and that 'Bon appetit' meant "Good appetite", or "I hope that you enjoy your meal!"

Santa breathed a sigh of relief on receiving this information. Next morning, at breakfast, Santa greeted the Frenchman with a, "Bon appetite."

The Frenchman nodded politely and said, "Santa Ji."

Who Is The Father - Funny Joke

A kid was crying standing outside his house.

A passer by asked: "Why are you crying?"

Kid: "My parents are fighting inside the house."

Passer by: "Who is your father?"

Kid: "That is what the fight is about."

Apr 17, 2016

Dumb Hunting - Funny Joke

Three idiots decide to go hunting.

The first one says he's going to get a buck. He goes out, and indeed comes back with a buck. The other two hunters ask how he did it. He says, "I see tracks. I follow tracks. I get buck."

So the second hunter says that he's going to get a doe. And he does. They ask him how he did it, and he says, "I see tracks. I follow tracks. I get doe."

So the third hunter says, "I'm just gonna shoot at anything I see."

So he goes out and comes back half a day later all beaten, bruised, bloody, and totally trashed.

The other two hunters ask him what happened and he says, "I see tracks. I follow tracks. I get hit by train!

Locked Keys - Blonde Joke

A blonde walks into a gas station and says to the manager, "I have locked my keys in my car. Do you have a coat hanger or something I can stick through the window to unlock the door?"

The manager gives the blonde a bent coat hanger.

A few minutes later, he goes out to check on her.

As her approaches the blonde working the hanger in the window, he notices another blonde inside the car, shouting "No, no! A little to the left."
 
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